Monday, December 11, 2006

Election Journal #4

Monday morning finds us here at C4CS07 in the midst of a mad dash to the finish. Team Has-Been has certainly been pulling out all the stops, and my operatives hear and read rumblings of dark accusations levied against both my candidacy and me personally. That's why I think it's time to set the record straight.

I graduated from the University of Southern California in 2003 with a B.A. in Political Science and a minor in Classics. English was not to be found on my degree at all, well, other than "University of Southern California" and "Bachelor of Arts" and stuff. I have never called anyone "cat" who was not a feline, and I have certainly never called Swanburg a cat.

That said, we have all had to battle our own demons in this world, and who are you to pass judgment on my own personal struggle? But inasmuch as I can warrant it, I promise to do my best not to pee on anyone's grandparent at Commencement.

I'm also getting lots of questions that seem to go to my candidacy being some sort of "joke." To answer them all now, no, this is not a joke. This is a chance to make history. This is also a chance for me to say many things to the Class of '07 that I think are worth saying, but that we may not hear from a "traditional" commencement speaker. That I have to mow down the legions of Big Has-Been's minions one-by-one (excepting, of course, my fellow nominee the radiant Ms. Meyer) is just part of my responsibility.

The times, they are a-changin', and the squeaky wheel gathers no moss.